The Sex Video…Welcome to my dating Life

The Snapchat Sex Video……
I became friends with this guy on Facebook. After chatting for a little while (5minutes) we exchanged Snapchat names. He sent me a video of himself having sex with some skank who kept calling him “daddy” and saying “you’re so big!!!”  I think he paid her extra to say that.

He spanked her a few times. She seemed to like it. I ate popcorn and watched it twice. The footage was dark and low-quality. I told him I had a video for him and he got very excited.
I sent him a Snapchat of me using the man filter.
I looked just like Fabio.  He was quite disappointed, but still wanted to know if I was wet yet. I haven’t responded. It’s been months.

Super Bowl Sloppines

I would have went to Hana

I was at a bar here on Maui watching the Super Bowl, when a sloppy drunk guy (playing pool behind me)  hit me with his pool stick. I moved out of his way. I let it slide.

Then immediately he hits me with it again. I grabbed it, pulled it, and spun him around.  I got right in his face and I said “You do NOT want to do that again. Next time you better pay attention and say excuse me so I can move.”

He almost shit his pants,  apologizing over and over. The room seemed  to stand silent for a moment. I think I scared the girls that I was standing with because they walked away.

Last years Super Bowl was a similar story. I had a really bad bruise on my shoulder and this drunk guy standing next to me was hitting my shoulder every time the Broncos did something good.

I told him repeatedly that I had a bruise and to please not touch my arm again. He was so drunk that he just kept doing it ….. and then I Snapped.

I told him… “Touch my arm one more time …. See what happens.” This guy! The drunk asshole started laughing as he reached over and was about to touch my arm again. I stopped him by saying “Do it, and I’m gonna whoop your ass” He stopped with  wide eyes and confused look on his face and pulled his hand back. His friend standing right next to him said “Dude, I think she might possibly be able to kick your ass, you better leave her alone.” I interrupted by saying “Yes, I can!”

Sloppy Joe went and stood in a different spot😳  I think I’m a super easygoing  girl. Apparently my other personality is beast mode. 😝

Fear of Adulting

“I’ll never do that!” She said

It was summertime down at the community swimming pool, I was probably 11 years old. I was sitting on the bench with one of my classmates eating a snack and he said something about a blowjob. I  regretfully asked “What is a blowjob?”

He told me it was when of man puts his privates in a girls mouth. I was horrified!  “I will  NEVER do that! That’s DISGUSTING!”

He told me that when I got older and had a husband I would do it.

“I won’t get married then!!!”

Update on Fetish Guy

Yes, we still talk and snap… Why not.? He lives on the mainland. Yes, he still lives with his mom and dad.  (He’s trying to save money guys! He won’t waste any money on rent.)

He’s super hot and I don’t mind getting his post workout pics.

He would be so much hotter though, if he didn’t send words with the pictures😂

Asking me questions like…”What would you do to me if I was in your bedroom right now”? & “Are you shaved”?😂😬  I ignore those questions…. If I’m gonna make up some erotic bedtime story for an “almost virgin” who’s 14 years younger than me, I better be getting paid for it ….shhhhit 🤑


What would you do for a blowjob?

Blowjobs… An even trade.

I was 30 years old and in a serious relationship with a 24-year-old man. I was talking to him while he was doing something on the computer and I couldn’t help but notice how long and beautiful his eyelashes were. I had an urge to curl them.

“Could I please curl your eyelashes?” He was 6’4” 260 pounds…..big tough guy. He immediately shut me down with a quick  “NO!” …

“Please? I really want to!” ….. Again…. “NO!”

“If you let me curl your eyelashes I will give you a blowjob!”

“Go plug in your curling iron!” He says😂😂😂😂😂

Memo to Females….. A proper blowjob can get you many of your hearts desires😝😂

Peep Show Hot Dogs

Memories…. Ahh, to be 19 again. Ummmm, No thanks….

I was 19 years old, dating and living witha 21-year-old man. He was a musician and we were renting a room from his band mate. We had lived there for about three months and we paid him our portion of the rent and electric.  One night our electric was shut off and our roommate was nowhere to be found. The next day an evection notice was put on the door. We found out that the  bandmate/friend had skipped town and that neither electric nor rent had been paid for our entire stay.

I needed a new job  so that we would have money to get our own apartment. There it was in the Classifieds….. Hotdog Girl. It was pretty good pay for back then $10 per hour, plus tips. I just knew I would make a killing in tips selling hotdogs….  here I am on my way to the interview for the hotdog selling job….. knowing I already had the job! So confident. I’m driving, and then I see it, the hotdog cart! I see the girl selling hotdogs that I have the interview with. And then I see it… Right next to it is a giant sign made out of old plywood….spray painted boldly…… PEEP 👀 SHOW $10

Yikes! It was right in front of a run down dirty strip club in an industrial area.   I was horrified &  must have forgotten that I was driving. Not paying any attention whatsoever, I turned  towards the parking lot not even realizing that there was oncoming traffic.  I drove straight into another car. I didn’t have my seatbelt on. It wasn’t mandatory back then. I almost flew through the windshield. I hit my head pretty hard. The man whose car I crashed into was furious. He was pacing back-and-forth and could not look at me or talk to me.  I told him “sorry”. Possibly ten times.

I walked up to the hotdog girl and said “Hi, I’m here for the job.” and then I laughed pretty hard. She laughed too.  This was before cell phones so I had to go into the rundown strip club and call 911 from the managers office. I  remember being  afraid to touch anything in that building .

The police officer showed up on a motorcycle he asked for my information and  quickly realized I was only 19 years old and applying for a hotdog job in a bad neighborhood….. in front of a strip club. He pulled me aside and told me that this was not a good job for me…. He told me he would come back and check to see if I was working here,  and if so, he was going to call my dad. ( I was still under my dad’s insurance so his name and phone number were listed).  I promised him I wouldn’t.  I was  traumatized.

My car was too wrecked to drive so I had to wait for the  boyfriend of the hotdog girl to take me home.  To this day, I think that story is still kept from my dad.

His Fetish

I went on a date with a guy much younger than I. He was very good looking and we were getting along just fine. I did feel he was acting a little more than nervous though. He was acting the way all adult male virgins have acted towards me….. Strange and Awkward  flirting…. Weird compliments like….”You have beautiful hands” btw this made me immediately hide my hands….

He confessed that he had only slept with one girl that he had dated for a year. They broke up recently. Yikes! We ended the date shortly after that. I’m not trying to teach sex to a 25yr old man.

The next day, he texted me…..  “Can you please send me a picture of your hands?”  My reply, “You’re kidding right?”

He wasn’t….. The End